In the pantheon of the open road, motorcycles are like adolescent gods: small, yep, but powerful for their size, which makes them very hard to catch. Still, within these teens’ ranks you’ll find hulks—the biggest, baddest kids on the proverbial schoolyard of Olympus. Either run with the troublemakers or get out of the way.
The GS in BMW R 1200 GS Adventure is German for Gelande Straße, or “off-road,” where BMW’s big baddies have trod since 1980. Though this 580-pound two-wheeler is too heavy to be much of a dirt bike, with its relatively off-piste-friendly suspension, it’s as close as you’ll get in a bike that’s also at home on a highway. From $18,695.
Kawasaki Ninja ZX-14
This 593-pound body exists primarily to house the Kawasaki Ninja ZX-14’s massive 1.5-liter four-cylinder engine. At 191 ponies, it cranks out more power than a Honda CR-V. Overkill? Only if you call a sub-10-second quarter-mile and 2.6 seconds to 60 overkill. (So… no.) From $14,999.
Indian Chief Dark Horse
A 9-foot-long single-seater weighing 800 pounds would look imposing in your rearview mirror, even if it weren’t a light-swallowing black that seemed to bend spacetime. But the Indian Chief Dark Horse is, and its 1.8-liter engine has enough grunt to tow a small boat. So move. From $17,499.
This article was originally published in the May/June 2017 issue of Popular Science, under the title “Heavy Metal.”