World’s Largest Atom Smasher Lab Treats Every Unattended Bag Like A Bomb

If you LHC something, say something

If you find yourself visiting the Large Hadron Collider, the world’s largest atom smasher, at CERN in Geneva, Switzerland, make sure you keep all your stuff in sight. Otherwise, it might get smashed.

CERN released the following announcement on their official website this past Friday:

CERN’s main campus is the size of a small town on the Swiss-French border, so there’s a lot of opportunity to leave stuff unattended. In fact, there’s an entire blog devoted to unattended chairs at CERN, and when I was there, I got pretty badly bruised riding an unattended shopping cart down a hill and into a wall. Neither the chairs nor the cart called for evacuations, but mysterious luggage might.

The author in a shopping cart
Me at CERN in 2012, seconds before crashing into a wall Ryan F. Mandelbaum

The statement doesn’t specify whether or not unattended luggage goes into the Large Hadron Collider (it definitely doesn’t), but it does remind visitors to make sure their bags are clearly identifiable. Or else.