You’ve seen The Jerk, right? If not, we suggest you load that bad boy into your Netflix queue, pronto. In this 1979 classic, Steve Martin plays Navin R. Johnson, an idiot-turned-inventor-turned-idiot who develops the “Opti-grab,” a nose bridge that keeps eyeglasses from slipping off your face. The gizmo sells like hotcakes until it starts making people cross-eyed and ugly. So, um, fast-forward to 2006. Recently, two would-be Navins came up with their own version of the Opti-grap: Pierced Glasses. Simply jam a magnetic barbell through the skin on the bridge of your nose, attach magnets to your eyeglass lenses and, presto, you have frameless eyewear—and a recipe for really bad headaches. This, like the live cockroach brooches I reported on earlier, is sure to be a hit with punks and Goth kids. Maybe I should change my title to PopSci accessories editor—might score more swag that way. —Nicole Dyer